Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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