Im at strip club and am horny
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize