lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
