i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I think my vagina is haunted
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I'm just crazy horny about you
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
