Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
