would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
