I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old