worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
