Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I just blew my weed a kiss
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize