How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Randomize
