she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
