He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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