somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
