Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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