Can i not drive my cunt home
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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