I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Randomize
