he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
