I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
