i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
