There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
