Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
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