the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
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