I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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