They should really pass out barf bags in church
I'm passing your future prison.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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