it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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