Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
