I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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