i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize