You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize