there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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