Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Two words: blizzard sex
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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