I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
