That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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