I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
