After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
