I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
