is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
You're like the curious george of whores
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
