btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
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