i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
