you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
