so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
