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Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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