ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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