She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Randomize
