Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
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