How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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