At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
