Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize