Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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