i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I need moral support for this bender
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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