So drunk its hurt
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
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