And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
